The Binky War

The Binky War

Written by Melissa Hadley, September 2021

Instagram: @melissaleehadley

The decision of whether or not to give your baby a binky is a personal one. I’m not going to mom-shame anyone for their decision in the matter. I made the choice to give my twins binkys as early as the hospital. They can be comforting for babies (and the parents), especially with twins, where you may not be able to tend to their every need right at the moment they need it (because you are tending to the other one’s needs too!). My twins took to the binky very well.  

Fast forward almost three years, and here we were, still with binkys. My first son also had a binky, but I took it away cold turkey at 18 months. There were a few rough days, but no biggie. The twins, however, have given me a run for my money and taking the binky away was not on the top of my list. In fact, it wasn’t even on my list at all! 

The worry of the binky affecting their teeth started to crop up. I wasn’t worried about it affecting their verbal skills because they were already talking all day every day. I also had this fear that if we took the binkys away, they would no longer nap. So we started the transition by only giving it to them at naptime and bedtime. We also still had them in cribs, (I know… another ‘to-do’ list item) and they also had crib tents (if you haven’t heard of these, they are a LIFE SAVER with twins. ANYTHING to help them nap during the day). Momma needs a break! #AmIright

After setting our fears aside, we decided to go all in, but we weren’t sure how. We were told many different ways, such as clipping the tip of the binky, slowly, more and more each day, having a binky fairy take them away, taking them to the store to pick out a toy in exchange for the binky, and many other techniques. I am a firm believer that you cannot raise every child the same way. Each child has a different personality and energy. Case in point, my twins couldn’t be any more different from one another! I realized that the same method was not going to work for both of them. 

My first born twin is the Alpha. He is very high energy, stubborn, and hard to outsmart. We knew that cutting the tip of his binky wouldn’t work for him. Coincidentally, we actually lost his binky one night, tried to offer him a replacement and he wouldn’t take it. He was mad as a hornet, but this technique actually worked for him. We didn’t “take” his binky away, we were offering him a replacement and he wouldn’t accept it. We had a rough couple of weeks with him and it is still hard sometimes, but the binky is officially gone! 

My second born twin is soft spoken, more understanding, and gets more attached to objects like his binky and his blanky. We knew that losing the binky cold turkey for him wouldn’t work. We decided to start cutting the tip VERY slowly. At first he didn’t notice very much. We clipped it a bit each day. He eventually noticed, and said it was broken, but he still wasn’t ready to give it up at that time. Eventually, though, as it got smaller and smaller, he decided to throw it away himself!

We still had (and have) rough nights sometimes, but I can check getting rid of the binky off my to-do list! Now, pray for me when we decide to put them in toddler beds and get rid of the cribs and crib tents! Not to mention potty training! 

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